Stuff and That

Wiggin Girls

In the second of our National Poetry Day tributes, Moonay takes a stroll down King Street. With apologies to our female listeners, it's not about you, obviously...

Wiggin Girls ……… by T’ Pie Shop Boys.

Sometimes when you’re in your shed,
There’s a pie in your ‘and, it’s as heavy as lead
Go on a diet, but tha’s just not able
Too fat for chairs, can’t fit under tables,
In a chippy, in a West Lancs Town
Pudding Fish & Chips, there’s a fat lass around
Dressed to kill, out to pull,
But tha’s not goin’ out till thy belly’s full

(Chorus)
In a North West town when t’ pie shop’s closed Standish lads chase Wiggin girls
In a North West town when t’ pie shop’s closed, There’s nowt as mucky as Wiggin girls Wig-gin girls

Too much make-up, trowelled on thick
Pee in t’ gutter, lean o’er & be sick
Nose job, botox, boobs are fake,
But she lets you smother ‘em in chunky steak
Lick it off, she’ll see you later, But don’t forget that meyt & prater,
Put it in your pocket, keep it warm,
She’ll eat it later on a buttered barm

(Chorus)
In a North West town when t’ pie shop’s closed Standish lads chase Wiggin girls
In a North West town when t’ pie shop’s closed, There’s nowt as mucky as Wiggin girls Wig-gin girls

You’ve got a big fat bum, and a great big bosom
When I get you home, we’ll go ten to t’ dozen,
Talk to me dirty, talk to me nasty,
But before we start, put down that pasty
Greenhalgh’s Galloways Glovers Greggs
The love of her life is a pie on legs
Bite into t’ crust, & suck out t’ filling It don’t take much to make her willing

(Chorus)
In a North West town when t’ pie shop’s closed Standish lads chase Wiggin girls
In a North West town when t’ pie shop’s closed, There’s nowt as mucky as Wiggin girls Wig-gin girls

 

Episode 32 of the pie at night podcast – Rocket Man is available from all the usual places, our Soundcloud page, on iTunes  or by searching on your preferred podcast app.  You can also get it on our brand spanking new AudioBoom page, or if you like it here, by clicking play on the player below…

 

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