Table Fever

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I’ve done it, the one thing I have avoided to do for so long. No it’s not cooking or hoovering, I’ve looked at the Division 3 table (League One) and now the torment has started. When Wigan Athletic were plodding around in the backwaters of mid table I was carefree and running through the slag heaps of the Three Sisters like a northern Julie Andrews singing “T’hill’s ar alive”

Then just like bloody Lot’s wife I resisted and cast my eyes upon our league position. Luckily I didn’t get turned into a pillar of salt though the wife was disappointed at the loss of an abundance of condiment (I’m Saxa and I know it)

There we were, just outside the automatic promotion spots and I knew that the table had my northern soul now. Not long after that we occupied one of the coveted top two rungs and table fever really kicked in then.

First thing is look at our remaining fixtures with my wildly optimistic view fuelled by promotion passion. Right I’ve worked it out and we just about… win every game… home and away. Well maybe we could? Okay, okay I’ll work it out again… Trouble is what if THEY win every game? I chew the end of my pencil until it looks like one of those liquorice root sticks you get from the chemist.

Well THEY and THEM can’t win every game because they have to play US and we are going to win every game! But outside influences could affect our chances… Referees hate us and are secret Warriors and Bolton fans that’s a known fact. We could get injuries to key players because the refs will let THEM kick lumps out of US.

And Granada Reports hates US they just do

No, no I’m getting carried away now; I have to keep my focus. I’ll just look at the top ten teams in the division, work out their expected points total and go from there. That’s it, that’s what I’ll do… that’s what I’ll do…

Tony Topping

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