The only election that matters!

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And this time we suspect some foul play and vote rigging going on. Yes it’s time again for the Wigan Athletic Room 101 or as it’s charmingly often referred to “The Emporium of Sh**e”.

For the uninitiated, we are working our way through the alphabet trying to list out those players who were the worst to wear the Wigan Athletic shirt and this week it is the letter M which gets the treatment.

We start by retrospectively allowing former guest and former Latics player John Coyne to put Pat McGibbon in because he asked for him to be included. His reasoning?

“He played at Man United one game in an infamous cup tie they lost 3-0 to York and got sent off. Wigan signed him off the back of being at United. He was tall and won headers but slow on the ball and he probably won half a dozen caps for Northern Ireland. I should add, he was a lovely fella”

By all means address your complaints to @mrjohncoyne on twitter not us.

Next up is Mido, for being fat and s**t and for driving a white Rolls Royce.

Jimmy gazumps Alan by nicking his Alan, none other than Alan McLoughlin aka the Invisible Man. As Alan says, open up a dictionary and look up the phrase gravy train and you’ll find a picture of Alan McLoughlin, grinning away whilst enjoying his one last payday.

Dave McKearney gets a vote from Ian although Jimmy attempts to defend him due to him being less rubbish than the rest of him team mates, and there is also a nomination for Andy Mutch, whom failed to recapture his Wolves scoring form in the absence of Steve Bull.

Marcelo Moreno was always going to be a popular choice given he failed to score a single goal for us and also committed the further crime of having long, silky hair.

Should Neil “runs around in circles a lot” Morton be thrown into the abyss? Again, given Jimmy’s deluded logic that Pat Gavin had the real talent in that partnership.

Josh McEachran also provoked some debate after being put forward by Chris. He seems to be doing very well for himself now but at the time just seemed like one of those players who had the world on a plate from a young age and was overpriced and overhyped despite never being likely to get anywhere near Chelsea’s first team.

There is a token mention of wee Bryan McLaughlin, Bolton reject Rudi Voller mulleted loanee Scott McGarvey and finally just the merest mention of Arsenal loanee Ryo Miyaichi for his fleeting appearance before getting locked in half and injured for the season. That’s the last we’ll hear of him I reckon!

So to the polls and as always we let the public decide. Though with a twist this week, as we have four semi (quarter?) finals thus ensuring that Alan McLoughlin and Pat McGibbon (again, complain to John) get a bye through to the final.

There is perhaps a minor shock in the 3rd poll as Marcelo Moreno barges the not inconsiderable frame of Mido into second place. Whereas in the final heat Ryo Miyaichi romps home (to be known henceforth as Ryo cos it’s a ball ache to spell) beating Mutch, McLaughlin and McGarvey to the final.

As for the final itself, well we don’t just smell a rat, we detect a whole sewer full of rats. Whether we really do have a whole host of younger fans voting or whether a Japanese Ryo fan club got confused and decided to all vote for their idol, I’m not sure but it was indeed the flying winger who took the honours knocking both Alan McLoughlin and Marcelo Moreno into 2nd and 3rd place.

And finally well done to John Coyne for voting for Pat McGibbon 37 times.

You can listen to this in full and a load of other football based nonsense here at the Pie At Night podcast

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